My blog has been idle for some time now. It made me think of the reasons why. Thus, discovering who I might be as a writer/blogger.
Time constraints? It is a cliche but I simply lack the time. It was when I took a break from work that I got interested in blogging. My mind was full of ideas and and I have had more time then to put them into writing.
Being back to work full-time has made me just want to come home at the end of every shift and rest and relax. Oh, yes. I’ve tried to concentrate and write after work or on my days off. I have always managed a few sentences until I felt ‘I just wanna laze out as I’ve got work (again) tomorrow’.
So to be able to write, I need THE time…enough time.
Writer’s block? It shouldn’t be. Inspiration abounds! Life never runs out of experiences to opine on. The problem occurs (I know that now) when I play safe on how to express these opinions. While others are bold and gutsy about a lot of issues, I’m not. I always have to rack my brains out to find the right and acceptable words to use for fear of reprisals. And when I can’t, I get frustrated, I stop.
There you go, that says a lot about me as a blogger. I have created my own ‘writer’s block’. When will I muster enough courage to tell it as it is?
Language barrier? Okay, I am lucky that in my home country, the medium of instruction is English and correct grammar is strictly enforced. But, even so, English is not my first language. Finding the right words when writing means the right English version, too. It is easier to articulate one’s thoughts and emotions by using a familiar language or dialect. This is true to both writing and when in a normal conversation.
Therefore, in my attempt to get my point across clearly, my rough drafts get shelved for proofreading and editing again and again until they get dismissed and unpublished.
So maybe, this is the kind of writer/blogger I am:
I need time.
I hesitate to tell it as it is.
Perfectionist (if this is the right term) with words.
Does it matter if these traits are right or wrong if they do get me into writing?
Am I even a writer at all?